Three amazons of my life ..

My life, I suppose, has been influenced more by the female divinity and strength than male's.
Be it my mom, sis, grandmoms, aunties, frens, teachers, mentors, colleagues, I really feel cherubic impact of theirs on my life.
And there are these 3 significant females in my life who have substantiated their influence by my existence of one heroic nature.
I would owe not just a part but almost all of me to them.
They are in me ,spiritually, just as the other 5 physical ingredients of life.
I know who of these ladies do I actually resemble the most and the least also.
The oldest of these is my grandmom.My dad's mother.
A lady with invincible power, a heart filled with love, a fighter, a dreamer, a lady of extreme emotions.
I dont know how much I miss her. Heaven is her abode now. I would see her in my dreams at night. and just wish I could meet her once and could kiss her soft cheeks.
And always wish that if God could have a plan like meeting the people He has of us a specific day in year, once at least.
It has been almost two years she left this world, she nevertheless is felt more than she is remembered.

Following her is my own mother.
Her placidity,serenity, divinity always makes me feel conquered and defeated and at my own will.
I yield to her forbearance and piousness at the same moment I am fighting to win over the situation or discussion.
There is nobody who knows my life as deeply as she does.Just nobody and there cannot be one.
I know it holds true for everyone on this earth.
I just wonder and wonder at her feelings, her calm disposition.
She would do more than I need.
She would care more than I can reciprocate.
And I find it as magical, like a river flowing not knowing where it will end but it flows.
　
And she is the third one whom I love the most and have half-lost a companion, a friend, a confidant since the time she has been taken away by love of her life.
My sister is the most amazing and vivacious part of me and my life.
She would know the best philosopies of life to play her role as daughter, a daughter-in-law, a wife , sister .She is just perfect to play any role in life.And she has outdone anybody in holding herself up during moments of torment.
She has been my aegis, she has been like a tree shade in scorching heat, she has been like a balmy breeze through my moment of distress and suffering.
I feel wonderful to have my life painted in colors of richness and exuberance by 3 generations of life.
I feel that power in me.
I see that beauty in me.
And as I said that I know whom I resemble the most of these 3 generations , I know it is true when I say the answer is my grandmother :)

All day long, deep in my heart, I yearn, I dream

I was a kid when I used to feel after waking up from sleep that moments before,I was running around bushes and waterfalls with mowgli, where has all that gone?.
Was not even sure of if there was something like that or not.
Didn't even know the word 'Dream'.
I dont know at which age of mine, I got to know this word and understood what dreaming means.
My fascinations, my desires, my fears, my interests have all been into my dreams at nights.
My dreams have trepidated me at times after watching some horror movie with horrifying creatures reappearing around me,and at times have heavenly pleased, have shown me gods and angels and fairies. .
I would have reached exams after they were over, would have forgotten admit cards at home.
I would have been on date with guys I had crush on.
I would have done never-done and never-would-be-done kind things in dreams, racing a scooter, running wearing pencil heels on marble floor with dogs chasing and falling every now and then to find an escape.
These dreams have kept me so much occupied during nights.
But mooning in day has been my steady soulful accomplishments.
As I grew in age and more desires for myself gestated in me, new dreams rooted up.
And the notion of a dream changed.
From night to day,
From fantasies to desires,
From subconsciousness to consciousness.
And the meaning as well ..
my dreams are my desires long awaited and would be longed for till realised ,
yearning for them in me is stronger than my habits.
Something I have lived in my mind whimsically,
have enacted my part of role into them or probably of others as well involved,
have practiced my lines of dialogues,
have walked my postures and moves and gestures,
have designed my attires and footwears and glass frames,
have lived the emotions of heart,
but only to a partial extent.
Something that I have wished for all truly in my heart, something that has no escape from my life till they get realised or till my last moment arrives, whichever comes earlier.
Something that has my soul into to nourish with all the resources that can bring my dreams in my front, live and tangible.

I dream to be
.... ... ... ...
I dream to do
... ... ... ...
I dream to find
... ... ... ...
I dream to have
... .... ... ...
I dream ...
I dream ...